today papa john’s called my starbucks and they were like “are u guys interested in a trade” and five frappuccinos later they gave us two large pizzas and a large order of cheesy bread
that girl you just called fat? who cares about her backstory, you just shouldn’t be a dick to people
like do we really need a tragic story to get people to stop being mean to each other wtf
- Me on my wedding day: you still like me right
nothing feels better than winning monopoly. not love. not sex. not free pizza. nothing
I’m sorry, have you tried pizza…?
yes and it doesn’t compare to owning half the board and watching the light die from your friends eyes as you take their money and feel your friendship slowly deteriorate
i like you